Some belated Fathers’ Day love for my two favorite vampire daddies. Vaddies?

From An Unexpected Addition, a short story included in Family Matters as bonus content.

~*~*~*~

For a couple of vampires who had learned, sometimes begrudgingly, to make use of all the modern conveniences that the world now had to offer, Dominic and Jacob were quickly discovering that diapers were one of the most frustrating modern conveniences of all.

“You need to pull it up in the back,” Jacob instructed as Dominic fumbled a diaper around the fidgeting infant. He inspected the package that his lover had purchased from the all night drug store down the street along with a bunch of other baby-related items (much to the confusion of the clerk who usually rang up their lubricant) and then glanced down at the freshly bathed child as he wriggled and writhed on the living room floor. “And then tuck the front part down and pull out the sticky things—”

“I don’t see any sticky things,” Dominic grunted.

“They’re right there on the… oops.” Jacob tugged on the front end of the diaper. “It’s backwards,” he said apologetically. “You’ll have to turn it around.”

With an exasperated sigh, Dominic took the child by the legs and gently lifted his rump. He pulled out the diaper and turned it around, then placed it into position once again. “I see the sticky things now,” he announced. “I think I can figure it out from here.”

Once the diaper dilemma was resolved, Jacob slid one of his old white T-shirts over the baby’s head and tied it off at the sleeves and bottom so that his arms and legs could move freely. It wasn’t much, but it would work for now.

“There we go.” He picked up the baby and offered him a bottle of formula, the second one that night. Having no idea how much or how often infants fed, Jacob figured it wouldn’t hurt to keep at it every couple of hours or until he fell asleep.

Dominic watched the boy suck away at the bottle. He tentatively reached out and touched the smooth bottom of a miniature foot, which caused the baby’s entire leg to jolt in reaction.

“He’s ticklish,” Jacob observed. “Just like you.”

“…You swore you would never speak of that again.”

“No, I didn’t.”

“Well, you should.”

Jacob snickered at Dominic’s indignation. “I promise not to mention one of your cutest qualities.”

“Thank you.”

“For the rest of the night,” Jacob amended under his breath. He stared at the child in his arms, his expression softening. “This is crazy, isn’t it?”

“It is,” Dominic agreed, running his hand over a crown of fuzzy yellow hair. “If we were thinking clearly, we wouldn’t even be considering this.”

“Are you saying that because he’s human or because you truly think that he would be better off with Child Protective Services?”

Dominic moved behind Jacob, his long legs stretched out on either side of him. He rested his chin on the vampire’s shoulder so that he could have a better view of the feeding. “Both,” he admitted. “How in the world are we supposed to take care of him, Jacob? We don’t know the first thing about babies.”

“Most new parents don’t. We’ll figure it out as we go along.”

“What about when the sun comes up? Do we just keep him locked in the basement with us because we can’t go anywhere?”

Jacob had to think about that one. “We’ll get one of those nanny-sitters. If this Luca turns out not to be some psycho pedophile, maybe we can hire him for the job.”

“What about food? We can’t feed him blood.”

“Formula and baby food.”

“And when he’s older?”

The nanny-sitter can cook for him, too. Unless you plan on doing that yourself.”

“Not likely,” Dominic responded coolly. “Education?”

“Homeschooling.”

“Friends?”

“Our friends will be his friends. I bet Becky is going to love him.”

“Suppose she gets the urge to bite him?” Dominic asked. “What if we get that urge ourselves? We may not feed on humans anymore, but you know the impulse never disappears completely.”

“Were you frequently overcome with the desire to bite the last human being you cared about?”

“Of course not.”

“And it won’t happen this time, to either of us. We’re vampires, Dominic. Not monsters. We don’t hurt children.” Jacob leaned back and turned his head so that Dominic could nuzzle his neck. “I know this is insane, but I can’t help but feel like we were meant to find him. Think about how many things had to fall right into place for us to find that exact dumpster on this exact night. Let’s give it a day or two. After that, if you honestly believe that he would be better off with a human family—assuming he even gets adopted by one—then we’ll turn him over.”

“I never knew you wanted to be a father so badly.”

Jacob shrugged. “I had no reason to think it would ever happen so I kept it to myself.”

“Is there anything else you haven’t told me that I should know?”

“Sometimes I braid your hair while you’re asleep.”

Dominic had already smiled more that night than he had in weeks. And there he was, doing it again. “What happens when he grows up?” he asked, becoming serious again. “When he grows old? Every single day of a human’s life brings them one step closer to an inevitable end. I know how it feels to lose someone. No vampire should have to live with that kind of pain. Especially you.”

The baby finished his meal, and Jacob set the bottle on the floor. He raised the infant to his shoulder and rubbed his back, something he remembered seeing on television, being the avid watcher that he was (unlike Dominic, whose own television preference began and ended with reruns of Dark Shadows). “You’re right. I don’t know how much it must hurt to lose someone the way you did. But I do know what it’s like to be abandoned. Someone literally threw him away like he was garbage, Dominic.” He pressed his nose against the baby’s skin and breathed him in. It wasn’t quite the new baby smell that the mothers on TV raved about but, having done the best he could using the kitchen sink, it was far better than the smell of trash and rotten food. “I want to make it up to him by giving him the best life possible. I know it’s not our place to do it, but I want to.”

Dominic took the child and mimicked Jacob’s burping motions. “So you think this is fate?”

“Yeah, I do.” Jacob turned around and faced them. “Getting thrown in a dumpster is a pretty shitty way to start living, but we found him, the same way we found each other.” He beamed at the boy, who was cooing steadily into Dominic’s neck. “How is that not meant to be?”

The lovers regarded each other. After a minute, Dominic relented. “We’ll give it one day.”

“One day,” Jacob agreed. “Maybe two. Or three.”

“All right.”

A loud burp caught them both off guard. Jacob was once again amazed that such a small body could produce such a big noise. “The sun will be up soon,” he said, glancing at his watch. “We should head down to the basement.”

Dominic gave the baby a few pats on the back. “We saved your life, and now you get to sleep in a coffin like the dead. What do you think about that?”

The baby opened his mouth and let Dominic know precisely what he thought. All over his shoulder.

“It’s running down my back. I think it’s in my hair.” Dominic closed his eyes, his face twisted in disgust. “Please do something. Please do something now.”

“Calm down,” a laughing Jacob told him as he reached for a box of powder-scented wipes. “You think this is bad, just wait until we get to deal with what comes out of the other end.”